A group of crazy, neurotic, absolutely hilarious erotic romance authors working together to corrupt the world... one reader at a time.

Friday, May 24, 2013

The Most Annoyingly Awesome Songs

You know what I'm talking about. You're riding along in the car, skimming through what seems like a million radio stations trying to find something decent to listen to when you hear it. You have a reputation to maintain as a cool person...but when you hear it, you stop. Just a small pause because you tell yourself you want to be certain you're hearing what you think you're hearing.

Then once you've confirmed that yes, this is a song that—although you know all the words because it came out when you were dating this guy, or hanging with this group of people, this is a song you don't want to listen to. But you leave it on that station. "There's nothing else on," you tell yourself as you tap your fingers on the steering wheel (or the keyboard if you're listening at home). "I'll just listen to this torture until something better comes on."

And then you sing this line...or hum that refrain...and next thing you know, you're going all friggin' out, singing along to this song that you swear is the most annoying song in the world and you're never going to it again!

Yes, I'm giving out awards to the top five songs that get me every single time despite my coolness. I swear it isn't my fault. It's like the fates want to mock me.

#5 - Journey's "Don't Stop Believing"

Don't get me wrong. This is a great song. I mean...it's Journey for crying out loud. But it ruins my image as a kick ass metal head. And it shouldn't be used as a wedding song. For anyone. Sorry. But no. Just don't do it. When I hear this, I think of the Olympics or something. It's not sexy.

#4 - Kelis' "Milkshake"

Maybe it's jealousy because I don't have very much milkshake to shake around. That means boobs, right? Because I'm not as blessed in that department as some people. *coughs at Sasha and Griffin* But I still sing the song...Even though I sort of keep seeing my cousin's husband singing...

#3 - Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody"

Actually, I adore this song and it has nothing to do with Wayne's World. This song has everything a closet car singer could possibly need. It has great lyrics, soaring soprano parts with plenty of opera to appease your inner Pavarotti. Then there's the hard rockin' guitars, the sweeping solos...it's just a great song and it doesn't fit with my kick ass image. It's a guilty pleasure.
#2 - Vanilla Ice's "Ice Ice Baby"

I don't care who you are. If you grew up in the 90's, you're going to know this song. Now, you might be lucky and it doesn't faze you. But if you're anything like me, the minute you hear that opening beat with the high-hat? You're ready to rap along and do that neck/body wobble thing he used to do. Right? I'm not alone in this, am I?
#1 - Aqua's "Barbie Girl"

Don't hate me for the earworms! I don't care what mood I'm in, or what I've just listened to (it could be Johnny Cash or Slipknot), if I hear this song I have to stop and listen to it. Even though it irritates me, it drives me insane and I can picture this video down to the plastic horse...I still sing it. Ever friggin' time.

Y'all are welcome.

What songs torment you on a regular basis?

Monday, May 20, 2013

And the award goes to...

Music while writing is so important to me, In fact I pretty much never write without it. I sometimes put the same song on repeat for hours while I work through a scene (does this make me seem a little crazy? Well, I just might be...)

So today I'm going to give you my top five songs for writing a sex scene.

5. Ginuwine-Pony
The reason behind this one is pretty obvious. I mean the song is pretty much all about sex.

4. Just Got Started Loving You
Yep, I'm a little bit country and this song...I mean how can you go wrong with a man saying he just got started loving you? The future promises to be real nice when that's just the beginning.  

3. Moves Like Jagger
Adam Levine half naked-enough said
2. Dirt Road Anthem
Okay, here's where things get weird. Not just because my redneck side is coming out again, but this song really doesn't have much to do with sex. It does have a good beat, and for some reason I like to use it a lot when writing sex scenes. Oh, and I prefer the version with Brantly Gilbert singing.
And my number one...for today anyway is the strangest of them all. Not really a sexy theme. I mean how sexy can a thrift shop really be, but it's working for me. It may have something to do with one of the first lines in the song. "walk into the club like what up? I got a big cock." That's sexy, right? And those pajamas he's wearing, definitely hot... ;)
1. Mackelmore & Ryan Lewis  Thrift Shop
To see the results from these songs...if the weirdness of my selections hasn't completely scared you off...you can check out the sex in the books at skyrobinson.com


Wednesday, May 15, 2013

5 Best Kisses and One bad one that irks me ...

Okay, these awards are just based on my opinion, but since I'm in control of the awards I get to choose. Muwahahahahahaha *THE POWER! OH THE POWER*

*clears throat*

Anyways, I'm counting down some of my favorite kisses from TV and Movies. In no particular order.

Number 5: The Tenth Doctor's clone kissing Rose (Long story) kissing.

 Number 4: The Ninth Doctor kissing Rose Tyler. At :51

Number 3: Persuasion 1996 (Not that crappy updated one). The kiss is at 3:11

Number 2: Richard Armitage as Mr. Thornton in North and South. ZOMG. ZOMG. ZOMG.

 Number 1: Okay, one of the funniest scenes which led to a LONG awaited kiss in a brilliant series known as the Vicar of Dibley. Also at the end leads into one of the nastiest, but still funny.

 And now for one of the worst. I love Jane Austen's Persuasion. I've read it. I LOVE the 1996 version with Ciaran Hinds and Amanda Root. I was kind of excited for the 2007 version, but it sucked. I hated what they changed. I just detested it.

 Her mouth was working like a fish and he's all like hesitating like he's trying not to laugh at her mouth opening and closing over and over again. I guess I just never connected with these two as Ann Elliot and Captain Wentworth.

 So those are some of my favorite kisses.

Yes, they're all British. Perhaps a nice British Flare awards and I'll work on a North American one next time.

Honorable Mention goes to As Time Goes By with Judi Dench and Geoffrey Palmer.

And now, a kissing excerpt from my upcoming release PRIVATE RELEASE coming June 7, 2013

 “It’s nothing… It’s just been a long time.” And no one has seen me naked since I was shot and left with a horrific scar.

 “You tell me if you want to stop. I’ll take this slow. We have all night.”

 Heat bloomed in her core. All night sounded like heaven. Adele licked her lips. “Keep going.”

 “All you have to do is tell me to stop and I will.” His voice was husky with need.

 “Don’t stop.”

 “I’m so glad you said that.” He pressed his lips against hers in a light butterfly kiss, which made her want to jump out of her skin. “Because I don’t want to stop.” He undid the buttons to her suit jacket and then slid it off her before tossing it away over his shoulder. It was her only good suit, but frankly right now she didn’t give a damn about her clothing. All she wanted to be was naked and under him.

 His hands slid down to her waist and he quickly undid the button her pants. Adele’s breath hitched in her throat as his fingers slid under his silk camisole, untucking it from her pants, coming so close to the puckered scar from the shooting. When Elias saw the wound, he’d been disgusted by the prospect of the damage it would leave on her body.

 “What’s wrong?” Jared asked. “You’re incredibly tense.”

 “Nothing. Don’t stop.” Don’t stop. Wash it all away, erase my nightmares.

 He tilted her chin, his gaze full of concern. “Adele?” She responded by running her hands up under his shirt and nibbling his jaw.

“I’m okay. Don’t stop.” Jared let out a feral growl, which caused her body to hum in excitement. He pushed her back against the mattress and pulled her pants down over her hips and off, tossing them in a different direction from her jacket.

Monday, May 13, 2013

The Knob Awards

The what awards you ask? The Knob Awards! This is the month of *awards* topic. I give my first Knob award to our Cabal calendar planner for planning said topics. No really, I like having these topics even if they twist your brain up trying to think of what to write.

So, we've all been knobs at some point in time. Come on...you know you have! How about we have a Knob competition? You think about the dumb things you've done that would win you the Outstanding Knob Award. Comment below and the dumbest will receive a virtual Knob Award and a shout out on my blog.

I'm not shy to share a few of my highlights of being a knob. And trust me, I have plenty.

1. Breaking my kitchen light because a piece of paper got caught under my mouse and I whipped it good, my hand smashing the light.

2. Having a bit too much Jack while trying to finish my latest menage story and *somehow* sent the contents of the glass flying all over my computer case. At least I had the sense to knock it away from the laptop. I did finish the story btw and an excerpt is below.

3. Being far too animated at dinner one night and using my hands to elaborate, knocking a wine glass over but being swift enough to set it right but not before a blast of red wine hit the wall and everyone wondered just wtf happened and how the wine got there. Led to much hilarity.

4. Not learning that my Croc flip flops are slippery on mud. Twice.

.... and the list could go on.

Anyone that can top these boner moves I bow down to and will happily bestow the Knob Award upon thee.

An unedited mini excerpt from Double the Pleasure (working title)

Heat flushed her cheeks and her nipples hardened whenever she thought about him. He didn’t even have to touch her and she wet her panties for him. Her pussy throbbed and she nearly swallowed her tongue when he glanced at her.. Had she moaned or something?
His blue eyes, so like the tropical sea across the beach, imprisoned her and she didn’t move. A slow, lazy smile widened his lips.
“Thinking about me?” His voice was just as slow and sultry as his smile, with a deep timbre that wrapped around her like hot honey.
“Uhm, maybe.” Faye squeaked and then tried to clear her throat gracefully.
“Tell me. If you were thinking about me and all the things you want me to do to you, I’d like to hear them.” Vance carried on slicing the papaya in front of him as if they hadn’t even spoken. His hands, large and tanned, handled the soft flesh with just as much care as he handled her.
She watched him, licked her lips and boiled inside. The Florida heat, only slightly tempered by the Gulf breeze blowing in off the sparkling waters, swept over her skin like a soft wet tongue.
His tongue.

Friday, May 10, 2013

And the worst ice cream flavor nominees are...

So, this month we're doing fictitious awards about whatever. I tried to think of something smexy or titillating  but really all I can think about is ice cream.

In no specific order are my nominees for ice cream flavors NO ONE would eat:

Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts


Backwash Swirl

Chocolate Arthropods (ants that is)

There you have my totally not writing or author related post. LOL

Which flavors would you try? What would it take for you to try them? :)

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The Bootay Hotness Laba-Laba Awards

Just a hint of tongue... 

Lordie, Lordie, whose idea was this topic?? It’s the kind of idea that just makes me start out snickering and ends with me rolling on the carpet, laughing, with my dog thinking I’m having a seizure and need mouth-to-mouth. Or make that mouth-to-tongue, which ain’t at all sexy…and not just because I’m not into girls!

Having gotten myself under control, I came up with a few awards I’d like to hand out, with apologies to the innocent, guilty and those upset by my total lack of political correctness.

To do the honors, I’ll pass you over to Simon Growell, who’s announcing the annual Bootay Hotness Laba-Laba* Awards winners and briefly interviewing them.

Take it away, Simon, and try to be nice.

Simon            Thank you, Anya. Although you blackmailed me into this job, I’ll not call you bitch, or harridan, or—

Anya:               That’s enough, Simon. Just get on with it, do.

Simon:             (sighing) Yes, of course. Ladies and Gentlemen, the first award of the night is the “I Wish I’d Written FSoG. Oh, wait, I did!” The nominees are too numerous to mention, but the winner is…Stephenie M.!

S.M.:                There’s been some mistake…

Simon:             Nope, I’m afraid not.

S.M.:                This is a travesty—

Simon:             I agree, on many different levels. On to the next (gives Ms. M a bit of a shove off the stage). Next we have the “Just Keep Coming Back” award, for longevity against the tide of irrelevance. And the award goes to…Janet D.!

J.D.:                Me? Oh, my! (kisses the trophy) I’d like to thank all my fans, and the great Queen Nora—

Simon:             (wrestling the microphone away) Cheeky, that, Janet. Very cheeky. Now, on to one of my personal favorites, the “These Twats are Just Jealous” Award. This year, we’re pleased to be able to combine it with the “I Wasn’t Seeking Attention” Award into one magnificent accolade to Diva-ism at its finest. (looks around with a smirk, just as there’s a small flurry of excitement in front of the stage. A woman comes up and grabs the award from Simon.)

Simon:             Well now, how do you know it’s yours?

E.L.J.:              I won’t say it again—Stop. Talking. About. My. Book. (marches off, as Simon begins to laugh hysterically. Eventually Simon picks himself off the floor and wipes his eyes.

Simon:             And now we’ve come to the moment we’ve all been waiting for. The apex of the evening—the Cuckoo-Cray-Cray Crowd Award! This is the first year we’ve had such a wonderful array of rabidity to choose from but, even with all the insanity, the award has to go to—select fans of Charlaine Harris. Apparently some of them are so upset Ms. Harris is ending the Sookie Stackhouse series after thirteen novels and umpteen novellas set in the Sookieverse, there have been death threats issued against the author. (looks at the card, eyebrows raised) Perhaps we should have called this one the “Get a Life” Award?

(a shot rings out, and Simon crumples to the ground, as a voice rings out, "Bon Temps FOREVER!!!")

*'Laba-Laba' is gossiping incessantly in Jamaican patois

Monday, May 6, 2013

And the completely fictional award goes to...

The hero who's Most Likely to Make You Melt With His Sweet Nothings...

The nominees:

Sebastian St. Amant (Should've Known Better), who speaks French
Marco D'Alessandro (Momentum), who speaks Italian
Paolo D'Alessandro (Velocity), who also speaks Italian

Here are some examples of the sweet nothings:

Sebastian -

He started to pick her up, and she protested. “I can walk. You’ll hurt yourself.”
Sebastian scoffed. “Ma belle, I bench two hundred fifty pounds for twenty reps three times a week. A tiny thing like you is not going to hurt me. Je suis un homme grand et fort.
Sarah laughed as he described himself as a big, strong man.


“Aren’t you going to kiss me goodnight?”
Marco ran a fingertip down her cheek and then over her lower lip. “I didn’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t hurt me.”
“Not for anything in the world, amante.”


Tu sei la mia bella donna,” he whispered, still playing with her hair with one hand as the other was trapped under the pillow.
Savannah smiled. “Why does it turn me on so much when you speak Italian?”
Paolo chuckled. “Maybe I should do it more often.”
“Maybe you should.” She ran her fingertips down his neck and over his torso. “What does it mean?”

Tilting her head up, he looked into her eyes and said, “You are my beautiful woman.”
“Voglio che tu così tanto.”
“And what does that mean?”
“I want you so much.”
“So many words to express a simple concept.”

Who should be the winner? (And yes, I did try to make them around the same length, but it was difficult.)
Tell me in the comments and you can win a copy of the 2013 Hot Damn calendar. Scott Nova, who's featured in it, signed it while he was at RT.

For more information about me or my books, check out my website at http://www.booksbycassandracarr.com.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

And the award goes to...

David Beckham
I don’t know what we were going for when this month’s theme was picked but David Beckham was the first thing that popped into my head. Maybe it had something to do with me patrolling the internet pics of him in scantily clad clothing, sweaty and bulging in certain places (ah hem). But the award, whatever it is goes to him.
That is all.